New Fic: [ Snips and Snails and Puppydog Tails ] - SPN, Gen, G

[mickeym]

Title: Snips and Snails and Puppydog Tails
Pairing: None, this is Gen
Rating: G
Word Count: ~790
Spoilers: None, it's pre-series
Warnings: None
Disclaimer: I don't own them, and I'm not making any money off them.
Notes: Y'all, I wrote Gen. *is amazed* I have no idea where this came from. I was thinking about Sam and Dean as kids, and what they might have been like very early on. Probably this popped into my head because I'm supposed to be working on something else. Or just working, period. Heh. Anyway, hopefully you'll enjoy it. It turned out flavored more sadly than I'd expected.
Summary: John watches his boys, and remembers.






Sammy cuts his first tooth on a hard rubber chew toy that belongs to Bobby's dog, Zeus.

John doesn't notice he's chewing on it until Dean tries to take it away from him, which makes Sam squawk in anger.

At least the teething makes the last week or two make more sense. John was starting to feel a little punchy from the lack of sleep, and frazzled from trying to soothe a baby who just would not be soothed.

He remembers buying fancy water-filled rubber rings for Dean, and Mary chilling them before handing them over to be gnawed on.

Guilt packs a powerful punch, and John leaves the boys with Bobby and Zeus to take a trip into town, to the local K-Mart. He buys teething rings, and some brightly-colored rubber balls and popsicles.

Later, when Dean's face is smeared with purple and orange, John tries not to remember the grape ones were Mary's favorites.

~~~~~

Sammy's first steps are unsteady, rocky, his little legs splayed too wide in an effort to stay upright. He stumbles toward Dean, who's standing just out of reach, a much-too-old expression of patience on his small face.

John smiles and nudges Jim, whose face creases into a smile as well.

Dean coaxes a few more steps out of Sam, holding out a bright green sippy cup as incentive. Sam stumbles before landing back on his knees, his little face screwing up to cry. Dean's there, instantly, taking chubby hands in his own and pulling him up while saying, "You're okay, Sammy. Don't cry, 'kay? Here, here's your juice."

In his mind's eye, John sees Dean, not even nine months old and already determined to be mobile. He remembers clumsy, awkward steps, and the little warm body practically falling into his arms. He remembers tears and baby giggles and hugging Dean, telling him not to cry, that he was okay.

He wishes he could still do that.

~~~~~

Dean's first day of school is stormy and cool, and he looks up at John with eyes shiny with unshed tears. "You sure I gotta go, Daddy?"

"I'm sure, Dean," John says gruffly, and holds out the Knight Rider lunchbox he's had hidden in Jim's closet for a week. "A dude can't have just any lunchbox when he starts school, can he?"

Dean's face lights up, then falls again. "Will you be okay with Sammy? I could stay--and keep an eye on him, instead?"

That makes John equal parts amused and sad, and he shifts Sammy -- squirming unhappily in his arms, not pleased to be restrained -- awkwardly while he tries to think how to handle this. How Mary might have handled it.

"I got it, Son. And you can watch Sammy for me when you get home."

A smile spreads over Dean's face. "It's a deal!"

Sammy's screeching into his ear as Dean disappears behind the school bus door. "Neeeeeeen! Neen no go!"

For the first time in a year and a half, John doesn't do Latin studies, or target practice, or read up on demonology. He takes Sam to the park and listens to him laugh and scream, "high, Daddy!" while they swing.

~~~~~

Zeus is an old, old dog now, so Bobby has a younger one he's training, too. He's calling this one Prometheus, which John thinks is fitting.

Prometheus hates everyone -- with mild tolerance for John, and even Bobby -- and growls at anyone who comes into the yard.

Except Dean and Sammy.

For John's boys, Prometheus reverts to puppyhood, chasing them up and down the rows of scrapped autos, barking madly when they turn and chase him. He fetches sticks and suffers Sam draping himself over his back in an effort to get a free ride.

Once upon a time, John gave "horsy rides" to Dean, and taught him how to throw a football.

Now, instead, he teaches him how to lay down salt lines and chalk protective symbols onto walls.

Sam, he's never given a horsy ride, to. Most of Sam's baby giggles came because of Dean. His first word was 'Neen', which became 'Dean' once he was a little older.

At least Dean remembers that he had a mother. Sam won't.

John sighs and turns away from his boys, racing around the junkyard with Prometheus at their heels, and back to Bobby, waiting with a cold beer and some information on the demon that John has been looking for.

His boys are young, yet. Maybe they -- he -- can find the demon, and end this nightmare. And then maybe his boys can have their father back, even if he can't give them their mother.

~fin~

Comments

[raynedanser.livejournal.com]

Oh my heart. As usual hon, this was just fantastic. I love it when you write Winchesters. :D

[mickeym.livejournal.com]

Thank you, honey. *hugs* I'm glad you enjoyed it :)

[innie_darling]

Oh, this was so sweet. Sammy carrying on as Dean gets on the bus! Gah!

[mickeym.livejournal.com]

Thank you! And yeah, I figure it'd be hard to tell for sure who the first day of school was more traumatic for, Sam, Dean or John. Heh.

Thanks for the comments!

[tsuki-no-bara.livejournal.com]

oh jeez. this is really sweet and really painful at the same time. the sam/dean bits are adorable (and of course prometheus loves the boys ^_^ ) but the way john compares sam's absent-father babyhood to dean's involved-father babyhood is just wrenching.

[mickeym.livejournal.com]

I was thinking, as I was writing this, about the expressions on John's face as he and Sam were talking during Deadman's Blood -- how John said he'd never planned for this, never wanted this life for his boys. And it made me wonder -- and think about -- how cognizant John would be about the differences between Dean's babyhood and Sam's. John's a very intelligent man, so I doubt it went unnoticed--and even being aware of it, he was probably helpless, to some degree, to stop it.

Thanks for the comments; I'm glad you enjoyed the story :)

[callsigns.livejournal.com]

*wibbles* You write young!them so well, oh my gosh.

[mickeym.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Jessa :) This really came out of nowhere and surprised me :) *hugs*

[ewanspotter.livejournal.com]

*wibble*

Wow... just... wow. Excellent job.

[mickeym.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it, and I appreciate the comments :)

[vanillafluffy.livejournal.com]

This is great. Poor John, rueful, regretful, guilty---this is definitely the same guy who sheepishly confesses that he spent the boys' college funds on ammo. And all the little details, like Sammy teething on a dog toy, and the grape popsicles and the Knight Rider lunchbox---and the bittersweet hope at the end---love it.

[mickeym.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much! I'm so happy you enjoyed it, and really appreciate the comments :)

And yeah, the scene between John and Sam in Deadman's Blood was totally what I had in my mind when I was writing this. Poor John :( He never meant for the life they ended up with.

[wendy.livejournal.com]

Oh this just breaks my HEART. *wipes tears*

[mickeym.livejournal.com]

*hugs you tight*

Thanks, baby.

very nice

[ndmzero.livejournal.com]

Hi, this is very sweet and moving, thank you. You didn't say you wanted feedback, but I'm going to comment -- apparently, the N sound is very hard for young children. My name is Nancy, and I was Cici to a friend's child for many years because N is too hard. This just made me think that it is unlikely that Sammy would say Neen instead of Deen - since "D" (as in Dada) is very common. But that is minor, and the story is very touching. Thank you.

Re: very nice

[mickeym.livejournal.com]

Hey! Thanks for the feedback :) I changed it in the version I posted to my website -- it's been a LONG time since my son was that little, and I appreciate the refresher :)

I'm glad you enjoyed the story, and I appreciate your taking the time to comment (and point the sound/name thing out) Thanks again :)

[destina.livejournal.com]

Sweet in so many ways; this is such a wonderful illustration of how close Sam and Dean were, but also of how much John loves them both, even if he is kind of perplexed sometimes about how to be the dad he wants to be. :)

[mickeym.livejournal.com]

I think...my thoughts only, mind, YMMV...that in the quieter times, before he was able to really go hunting full-time, that John was aware that Sam was being shortchanged (as was Dean, if in different ways). Aware, but unable (and possibly unwilling, to some degree) to change it, or redirect it. I don't think he ever intended to lock them all in to a lifetime of hunting -- and I suspect that as he got more in to it, he realized the potential shortening of his life expectancy.

The whole family breaks my heart--they have all suffered so much :(

Thanks, hon :)

[bbrownsugar.livejournal.com]

Oh, my heart. That was sad and perfect and incredibly well-written. Great work.

[mickeym.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much! Glad you enjoyed it, and I appreciate the comments :)

[iamstealthyone.livejournal.com]

Lovely and aching look at how John’s relationship with Sam is different than what he had with Dean, and at how he’s not the kind of father he used to be.

Favorite lines:

Later, when Dean's face is smeared with purple and orange, John tries not to remember the grape ones were Mary's favorites.

Oh, John.

He remembers tears and baby giggles and hugging Dean, telling him not to cry, that he was okay.

He wishes he could still do that.

So, so sad thinking of all that’s changed.

Sammy's screeching into his ear as Dean disappears behind the school bus door. "Neeeeeeen! Neen no go!"

Aww, too cute. *g* I love how he says Dean’s name.

His boys are young, yet. Maybe they -- he -- can find the demon, and end this nightmare. And then maybe his boys can have their father back, even if he can't give them their mother.

So bittersweet, knowing what happens when John finally has the showdown with the demon.

[mickeym.livejournal.com]

So bittersweet, knowing what happens when John finally has the showdown with the demon.

It really is, isn't it? And the search for the demon took so long...John didn't have the time he thought he had :( I feel so bad for all of them, because I don't think he meant for it to be a lifelong, consuming thing.

Thanks for the comments--I'm really glad you enjoyed the story :)

[turps33.livejournal.com]

This was just heart breaking and sweet and loving.

I just love how you write these boys.

[mickeym.livejournal.com]

Thank you, honey. *hugs you*

[marvinmuse.livejournal.com]

Aw! Poor John! Poor broken boys! Loved the story!
-Marvin

[mickeym.livejournal.com]

Oh, I love your icon! And thank you so much--I'm really glad you enjoyed the story :)

[marvinmuse.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I sorta saw the scene and was like, John and Sam are Dean's home! hehe
-Marvin

[not-sally.livejournal.com]

Ow. Dude, you totally broke my heart.

[tcs1121.livejournal.com]

I hate leaving feedback so many years after the original posting. Wait.

That's not exactly true.

Beautiful job M2. As always.

[rince1wind.livejournal.com]

Good. And sad. Thanks.