Is it just me who finds this creepy?
Jul. 20th, 2008 03:41 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mickeymIn Pursuit of Teen Purity
The pictures are bad enough -- the one at the top of the article has (presumably) two fathers and two daughters, and one "couple" are in what seriously looks like a couple-y pose. *shudder*
The whole thing is creepy, in my opinion, but this passage from the article just creeps me the fuck out (bolding is mine):
When Kylie was 13, her parents took her on a hike in Lake Tahoe, Calif. "We discussed what it means to be a teenager in today's world," she says. They gave her a charm for her bracelet--a lock in the shape of a heart. Her father has the key. "On my wedding day, he'll give it to my husband," she explains. "It's a symbol of my father giving up the covering of my heart, protecting me, since it means my husband is now the protector. He becomes like the shield to my heart, to love me as I'm supposed to be loved."
In theory, I get the idea behind the Purity Balls. But why isn't anyone addressing this with boys, too? Why isn't anyone getting all the kids together and saying "hey, you know what? You don't have to have sex, or (whatever, fill in the blank). Just be kids, have a good time growing up."
Honestly, I think the whole focus on 'purity' is more than a little weird (and not a little Victorian. Or, y'know, medieval.). If people want their daughters to be pure, well. Let's get rid of "french maid" halloween costumes for *children*. Or crop tops. Or shorts, etc., that have words written across the butt, or the other myriad of girls' fashions that seem determined to flaunt and exploit children and teens' sexuality.
And for God's sake, include the boys, too!
The pictures are bad enough -- the one at the top of the article has (presumably) two fathers and two daughters, and one "couple" are in what seriously looks like a couple-y pose. *shudder*
The whole thing is creepy, in my opinion, but this passage from the article just creeps me the fuck out (bolding is mine):
When Kylie was 13, her parents took her on a hike in Lake Tahoe, Calif. "We discussed what it means to be a teenager in today's world," she says. They gave her a charm for her bracelet--a lock in the shape of a heart. Her father has the key. "On my wedding day, he'll give it to my husband," she explains. "It's a symbol of my father giving up the covering of my heart, protecting me, since it means my husband is now the protector. He becomes like the shield to my heart, to love me as I'm supposed to be loved."
In theory, I get the idea behind the Purity Balls. But why isn't anyone addressing this with boys, too? Why isn't anyone getting all the kids together and saying "hey, you know what? You don't have to have sex, or (whatever, fill in the blank). Just be kids, have a good time growing up."
Honestly, I think the whole focus on 'purity' is more than a little weird (and not a little Victorian. Or, y'know, medieval.). If people want their daughters to be pure, well. Let's get rid of "french maid" halloween costumes for *children*. Or crop tops. Or shorts, etc., that have words written across the butt, or the other myriad of girls' fashions that seem determined to flaunt and exploit children and teens' sexuality.
And for God's sake, include the boys, too!
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no subject
Date: 2008-07-20 10:04 pm (UTC)What kids need is honest, no-shit information. "Just say no" didn't work in the 80s, and it doesn't work now, even when you dress it up in formalwear and make it unbelievably creepy.
And really, why is it that anyone feels there needs to be a formal dance for this? What about the kids/parents who can't afford a fancy dress and/or suit, or where there is no dad around, and hasn't been? I really was impressed (NOT) with the dude who's fathered nine kids on seven different women, and who is now 'stepping up' to be a role-model. Dude. Keep your pants zipped up, or wear a rubber, or get a fucking vasectomy. You go around fucking that many women, you're a walking billboard for STDs (among other things). Be a role-model by NOT IMPREGNATING EVERY WOMAN YOU SEE.
I think my train of thought derailed. Ugh. Now I'm all rage-y and stuff, so I should probably go make dinner. And you're welcome to use my "stabbitystabstab" icon, here *g*
no subject
Date: 2008-07-20 11:39 pm (UTC)You note that the 9-kids-guy is only stepping up now because he has stage-4 lung cancer.
I read the article in full, and really, part of the problem (aside from the OTT SQUICK of it all) really hit me in the last few paragraphs where they talked about "dating with intent." Nobody just *dates* any more. It's all "going together" / boyfriends / girlfriends / exclusive couples, and the thought that each relationship might be "the one" and last forever. That's a lot of pressure when teens should be going out with a lot of different people, being friends, having fun, and sneaking kisses in the back of the theater.
But that one father, wanting boys to come ask for permission to get to know his daughter? WTF? That's a recipe for rebellion simmering on the stove.
And what the HELL with the 4-year-olds there pledging their "purity"?? *squick squick squick*