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mickeymTitle: The Hell To Be Endured Hereafter
Pairing: None, this is Gen (Dean)
Rating: PG
Words: 244
Spoilers/Warnings: Vague for S4, PTSD
Disclaimer: Sadly, they're not mine.
A/N: Trying to start writing again is kind of like riding a bike after a long time. Muscle memory is there, but things feel stiff. This is me, working out the kinks.
Summary: Dean's out of Hell, but is Hell out of Dean?
You remember light.
You remember when you were part of that light, when it surrounded you, embraced you, made you warm and whole.
Now it's darkness all around, pressing in on you, encroaching on the light. Pushing it back. Blocking it out. Slicing into you and leaving cold in its wake to chill you.
You wonder, if you cut yourself open, would you bleed anything but blackness? Would there be anything but the shadows you feel wriggling under your skin, phantom snakes moving through you?
When you close your eyes you see splashes of color, red dripping, bleeding, melting into the black until it's swirled away into nothing.
You try not to close your eyes.
You raise the bottle to your lips, watching the tilt and swirl of the liquid within, and the way the lamplight around you diffuses it as it passes through the glass and then the liquid. More shadows, more darkness. It's everywhere now; you see it in Sam's eyes and hear it in his voice; you see it in your own eyes when you stare into the mirror. You drink, feeling the heat trickle down your throat to sear you deep inside. Enough of that liquid heat and you'll be able to push the darkness back, for a while. Or at least not notice when it wraps you in its embrace and squeezes.
You drink again.
And again.
You remember the light but all you know now is the dark.
Pairing: None, this is Gen (Dean)
Rating: PG
Words: 244
Spoilers/Warnings: Vague for S4, PTSD
Disclaimer: Sadly, they're not mine.
A/N: Trying to start writing again is kind of like riding a bike after a long time. Muscle memory is there, but things feel stiff. This is me, working out the kinks.
Summary: Dean's out of Hell, but is Hell out of Dean?
You remember light.
You remember when you were part of that light, when it surrounded you, embraced you, made you warm and whole.
Now it's darkness all around, pressing in on you, encroaching on the light. Pushing it back. Blocking it out. Slicing into you and leaving cold in its wake to chill you.
You wonder, if you cut yourself open, would you bleed anything but blackness? Would there be anything but the shadows you feel wriggling under your skin, phantom snakes moving through you?
When you close your eyes you see splashes of color, red dripping, bleeding, melting into the black until it's swirled away into nothing.
You try not to close your eyes.
You raise the bottle to your lips, watching the tilt and swirl of the liquid within, and the way the lamplight around you diffuses it as it passes through the glass and then the liquid. More shadows, more darkness. It's everywhere now; you see it in Sam's eyes and hear it in his voice; you see it in your own eyes when you stare into the mirror. You drink, feeling the heat trickle down your throat to sear you deep inside. Enough of that liquid heat and you'll be able to push the darkness back, for a while. Or at least not notice when it wraps you in its embrace and squeezes.
You drink again.
And again.
You remember the light but all you know now is the dark.
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no subject
Date: 2009-10-20 08:09 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 05:23 am (UTC)*hugs* Thanks, darlin' :)
no subject
Date: 2009-10-20 08:29 am (UTC)the way the lamplight around you diffuses it as it passes through the glass and then the liquid
I really like this, love visual details like that. Makes me want to film it.
no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 05:23 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-10-20 02:42 pm (UTC)You're back on the bike and riding just fine, believe me!
love, Robin
no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 05:24 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-10-20 03:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 05:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-10-20 04:16 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-12-11 05:27 am (UTC)I was really...boggled, I guess, by how much Dean started (stepped up?) his drinking, once it became apparent he remembered a lot more about Hell than he was letting on. The whole Winchester family seems to take to alcohol, and it just broke my heart to see Dean dealing with it like that :(
I really appreciate the feedback :)
no subject
Date: 2010-02-23 06:31 am (UTC)DEANNNN!! *smooshes* Oh goodness! *sniffle*
He needs a huge hug, from Sam and everyone else. *smooshes again*
I don't think you have any kinks to work out :)