wherein I discover slash has ruined me completely

The Other Child is over, and the boys are playing...something...on XBoxLive. Snippets of conversation:

"He's teabagging it!"
"You WISH it was your ball(s)."
"Now I'm going to teabag you; that's what you get."
"Somebody get me from behind."
"Dude, I just got ganged up on."
"Dude, they came at me with two big swords."
"Did you see how close I got?"
"C'mon, T, we can do this."

I'm sitting here snickering and wondering what those phrases would sound like to someone not totally perverted by slash fandom *g*

(Also? Really hope 'teabagging' means something else in battle jargon than what I understand it to mean. Oi.)