Lovely and aching look at how John’s relationship with Sam is different than what he had with Dean, and at how he’s not the kind of father he used to be.

Favorite lines:

Later, when Dean's face is smeared with purple and orange, John tries not to remember the grape ones were Mary's favorites.

Oh, John.

He remembers tears and baby giggles and hugging Dean, telling him not to cry, that he was okay.

He wishes he could still do that.

So, so sad thinking of all that’s changed.

Sammy's screeching into his ear as Dean disappears behind the school bus door. "Neeeeeeen! Neen no go!"

Aww, too cute. *g* I love how he says Dean’s name.

His boys are young, yet. Maybe they -- he -- can find the demon, and end this nightmare. And then maybe his boys can have their father back, even if he can't give them their mother.

So bittersweet, knowing what happens when John finally has the showdown with the demon.